Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad Day
WonderBaby's Countdown to Friday the Thirteenth:
1) Sob throughout afternoon at daycare. Sob when Mommy comes to pick you up. Shout NO at daycare lady when she says see you tomorrow.
2) Blow kiss at daycare lady, to take the sting out of the NO. Kiss Mommy, then smack her on the head for having left you at daycare in the first place.
3) Arrive home. Ask for Daddy. Accept cookie in place of Daddy. Throw cookie at Mommy.
4) Ask for ice cream. Refuse ice cream, to f*ck with Mommy's head.
5) Lay on floor and emit extreme heat.
6) Watch Mommy freak out while she calls TeleHealth and tries to find rectal thermometer. RECTAL THERMOMETER. Change mind about ice cream.
7) Attempt to reduce temperature through force of will. Fail. Cry POO! throughout temperature-taking procedure. Accept cherry-flavoured Tylenol drops as compensation for violation of person.
8) Demand to know where Daddy is. Ask to be given bath by Daddy. Ask to be put to bed by Daddy. Refuse comfort from rectal-thermometer-toting-daycare-abandoning-Daddy-withholding Mommy.
9) Rejoice in arrival of Daddy. Fall limply into his arms and communicate telepathically about the torture that Mommy has forced you to endure.
10.) Whimper, to underscore your point.
11.) Permit Daddy to put you to bed. Refuse bedtime kisses from Mommy. Watch impassively as Mommy crumbles to pieces from fear and guilt.
12.) Sleep. Let body cool. Do not stir when Mommy comes in to take temperature with kisses.
13.) Awaken to Friday. Commence crying.
Happy Friday the Thirteenth.
posted by Her Bad Mother @ Friday, July 13, 2007
52 Comments:
I am hoping that Wonder Mama had a glass of wine after wards.
We all have these days.
Thank the Gods for Tylenol
Sick babies are the terribly not fun. And I've had that sudden clutch of fear and guilt SO many times - like when my daughter spent the afternoon at school WITH A BROKEN ARM.
That was the school's fault. Still felt bad.
Poor baby. Hope she's not STILL crying.
My 6 month old has the same cold I have right now and it is so not fun. I tried to suck out his nose yesterday and it was like a boxing match, not to mention that I actually got one of those silent screams from the ordeal. How do you explain to a 6 month old that he can't eat if he can't breath through his nose?
I feel your pain.
Well.
Hmm.
There's always this: at least it's a wonderful photo of Baby-A-Bit-Lacking-In-Wonder-Temporarily-Of-Course.
I'm thinking our kids are twins, separated at birth. Same thing going on in our house.
You are making me rethink this whole toddler adoption thing all over...
I had sort of forgot about the lemon chucking at momma's head.
Aw, screw it. I've become rather adept at dodging things my kids toss at me.
What's one more added to the mix?
If it's any consolation, I have colleagues in their 40s who do the same thing. You should see them in department meetings, the difference being that they can articulate, so to speak. Petulant? You bet.
Oh now, throwing cookies at your head is just her way of saying, gee you're swell.
Antique Mommy - that, or her way of saying, gee, your head makes a nice target.
Do you ever get anywhere with TeleHealth? Every time we call, we're on hold for 30 minutes only to to be told, "If you feel you need to, then please head to your ER." SO unhelpful.
Here's hoping Wonderbaby is feeling better very soon!
Karen: that was exactly why I hung up after ten minutes. Cuz we done been there. Called Women's College instead - they were more helpful.
If you had to have something thrown at your head...at least it was a cookie? OK, not helping.
I just commenced crying (for you).
All the heaping of affection on Daddy, with reproachful looks flung at Mommy now and then - sounds wa-a-ay too familiar.
I hope the day improves as it wears on (and on...and on...)
As we ALL know, this is one of the many fringe benefits of motherhood. Somehow, it makes the option of a cell/cube in an air conditioned office seem all the more attractive.
Best wishes and hopes for a speedy recovery.
Poor mama! How's she feeling now? Temp down? I HATE sick babies. They are so pathetic and scary. If they just had a flashing sign on their forehead that said "do not freak out, just a cold" or "take me to the e.r. NOW" then life would be so much easier.
Misterpie got called to pick up Pumpkinpie from daycare yesterday too, as she was just kind of... limp. Not herself. Seemed okay this morning though, jumping back and forth over her floor puzzle.
Telehealth always makes me feel/worry that there is something much more wrong with the Boy than there actually is. I balk at calling them every time.
If it makes you feel better, the Boy spend about 85% of his time with me saying "I want my daddy", or "Where my daddy is?"
The best (BEST) investment we ever made was the digital ear thermometer. Can't say enough good things about it.
Hope WB is feeling better today!
you know, i have never been able to bring myself to use a rectal thermometer, and it's not like any of the others would work real well on a small child, so i have NEVER actually taken my kid's temperature (at least, at all accurately).
And don't worry; I hear that Friday the 13ths are the exclusive domains of the mamas.
Poor WonderBaby and poor, poor you. *Hands wine through puter. It may help.*
I hope she's back to her crazy self soon. A mommy lovin phase too.
It's Friday the 13th!
Thanks you so much for pointing that out. Seriously. I was just reflecting that it's been a long time since I've had such a bad morning with Bub (mainly). Now it all becomes clear.
Ahhh the 13th cometh. I felt so bad for the POO!
Ooooohhhhh...
Yes, I know those feelings. And if only she had been awake in the middle of the night the day before to know how much you were longing for and missing her....
The torture of parenthood is that, having discovered at last how our parents felt, we are now raising children who won't know this themselves for 30 years.
I hate when the toddler asks for his Daddy. It's like he's purposely trying to hurt me. The little punk.
I have been going through the same thing with my older two. The only difference is they treat Daddy like the ice cream: "Want Daddy!" Here's Daddy. "No Daddy! Go 'way, Daddy!"
I figure as long as their heads don't actually spin around while they're vommiting, we'll make it through.
How do they get so good at the guilt trip thing at such a young age???
Rosebud has an ear infection, she is the flower girl in a large wedding tomorrow, she barely napped today. I understand, I really do.
Hmmm. sounds like fun!
Hope she's feeling better...
It's curious yet incredibly frustrating how children don't want to be consoled by one parent and favour the other -- petulance comes with fever. You have the patience of Job. I hope that she gets better soon!
Children are funny little things sometimes. I never quite understand why I sometimes suddenly become 'evil Mommy' and he only wants Daddy at the end of the day, even when it's been a really good day!
I hope she's feeling better -- and you, too.
Awwww. Poor WB! And poor you, too. Hope she is feeling better soon.
Oh -- and I just read this entire post to my husband. And his response(besides laughing) was to say ' See. It's not just you who's being tortured by their toddler! Don't you feel better?'
Ohhhh...she's SICK!
Mine acts like that on a regular day. ;)
Hope the sickies depart swiftly. Otherwise, in my non-medical advice, medicate medicate medicate. :)
Oh no... I hate it when my kids are sick.... te control freak in me has a real problem with not being immediately able to DO SOMETHING to fix it!
Hey, at least she had the excuse that she's sick. My kids throw things at me and would rather have Daddy every day. It's a wonderful life I lead.
I'm at the bottom of my son's totem pole everyday. Kills me.
Hope you had a drink or 7 after your bad day. Hope Wonder baby is now on the mend...along with your heart.
Oh poor sweet thing.
You and her.
Hang in there my friend.
Poor Mommy. Those days are very rough.
I hope your Saturday the Fourteenth will be better.
Well...as long as her head didn't spin completely around on her neck I'm guessing she'll be okay soon. The Tylenol kicking in was a good sign because I'm pretty sure it doesn't work on demon possession. Poor Mommy! Poor Wonderbaby!
poor baby! poor you!
hope the baby gets better very soon. . .
Having read your last two blogs in reverse-order, I really appreciated the difference of Wednesday's sweetness contrasted with Friday's outrage.
;-)
Hope she's feeling better.
Oh, without a doubt, Mommy is always the Complaints Department.
raising a glass to the future, our future, of twos and threes.
That would explain those calls to Canada on our phone bill. Sorry, Cordy must have been sharing her best mommy-guilt inducing tips with WB.
Ooh, I've had those days. We seemed to have escaped the curse of the Friday 13th and had quite a lovely day, but the evening of the 12th? Torture.
Hope your weekend has been better, and WB is back to her usual wonder-self.
Isn't it amazing how quickly they go from sweet and cuddly Wednesday to who are you and where is the parent I REALLY want Friday. I guess it is just a small reassurance to know that it sounds like everyone gets it from time to time. Hope she's feeling better.
I know this baby. I've met this baby. This baby lives in MY house too.
Clone baby. Evil cloning baby.
late to this, but still giggling. with great sympathy for poor, rejected, lemon mommy.
apparently Wonderbaby passed her entire condition - misery and love of Daddy - on to our house for the weekend. :)
please thank her.
They just know how to stick a dagger in your heart, don't they? Rest assured, you will be her 'one and only' soon enough.
sending you all my best wishes -- and a good bottle of Vodka -- for a speedy recovery.
Youch! Not a good day! My son has taken to his daddy lately too. I love that he's excited to see him, but my gosh, does he have to cry when his daddy tries to hand him back to me?
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