Her Bad Mother

Monday, February 18, 2008

Jockstrap Mondays

I am spectacularly, hormonally cranky today. You don't want to be anywhere near me, because I guarantee you that you will not be able to say the right thing. Just ask my husband. This mood has been going on for two days now, and I think that he's considering wearing both earplugs and a jockstrap. You know, to protect the vulnerable parts.

So, there is just no readable prose forthcoming from me today. Or, probably, tomorrow. Unless you count the mocking of celebrity penises readable prose. In which case, you're in luck - I've had a lot to say about celebrity penises of late.

(If you are easily offended or weak of stomach or in the presence of small children, do not click on the first two of the above links. Just don't. I warned you.)


Blogger Liv said...

OH, C, I had to look....and yet! you're naughty! and yet, i love it! i mean, LURVE it, you gloriously hormonally pent up woman! rage on!

(how's that for most exclamation points ever?!)

5:34 PM  
Blogger Maddy said...

Well that sounds like a dare! I'll have to go and see how truly weak I am.

6:36 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

That photo is forever burned into the back of my eyeballs.

And when your hubby is done with the jockstrap, maybe he can send it to mine. Oh wait. I think you aren't supposed to share such things.

6:51 PM  
Blogger ewe are here said...

Ack! I clicked. Ack!

How will I ever sleep again?

6:55 PM  
Blogger flutter said...

MY EYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was referring to Juliette Lewis's hair, of course....

7:43 PM  
Blogger gwendomama said...

nightmare material, that. thanks though - for the warning. that was fair.

since you are pissed off and talking about celebrity penises, you should probably pick a fight with someone about your baby's penis and it's intact-ness or not.

you know. for pissed off penis fun.

8:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ack, you had me at "Just don't!"

9:00 PM  
Blogger Heather said...

Gah! That's just plain wrong!

9:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm a tad grumpy myself tonight thanks to two children who won't stop arguing and the law says I can't strangle them...

Maybe a few small penises will cheer me up...

9:51 PM  
Blogger josetteplank.com said...


I'm envisioning a porno version of Lord of the Rings with Danny as the naughty Hobbit, Dildo Baggins.

Thanks for that.

11:17 PM  
Blogger motherbumper said...

Always with the teeny bits! You have no shame. That's why you are my buddy.

7:40 AM  
Blogger furiousBall said...

Dear you lady,

you owe me a keyboard for making me spit coffee all over da place.

9:42 AM  
Blogger Grim Reality Girl said...

What has been seen can not be unseen... I was warned, I should not have clicked that link.....

11:44 AM  
Blogger KG said...

Um . . . I'd like to check up on the Brad Pitt allegations for myself.

12:43 PM  
Blogger Julie Marsh said...

Wanna come over and sniff some Grey Goose?

2:34 PM  
Blogger caramama said...

I just can't do it! I can't click over! Especially after reading the comments! I will forever lack the knowledge of what you all are exclaiming over.

As for hormonal, I was a mess my entire pregnancy! I crazy lady mess! I hope you are getting the crazy happy moods as well as the angry and sad moods. :-)

2:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Everyone needs a niche. ;-)

3:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The crankiness has come south, because today I could KILL someone. I'm not picky. Anyone who crosses me.

This pregnancy stuff is getting old.

4:11 PM  
Blogger Mom101 said...


*I just wanted to say that because often a good PENIS! outburst can do wonders for the crankiness.

9:33 PM  
Blogger the mystic said...

At first I thought the Bonaduce one was the old Burt Reynolds when he posed for Playboy (hello, does that date me???). Eeewwwww!

12:48 AM  
Blogger iheartchocolate said...

I can't do it! I wanted to, but I can't.

Such a wimp.

9:21 AM  
Blogger the Lerro family said...

Check out the latest post on Mom101...the "anatomically correct" boy baby she talks about is still more well-endowed than Bonaduce. Sad, but true...

6:09 PM  
Blogger Pgoodness said...

dude. ewww. seriously, bonaduce? I think I just threw up a little in my mouth! hehe

and Brad Pitt...well, are we really going to go by anything Juliette Lewis has to say?! LOL.

11:15 PM  

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