Her Bad Mother

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Blah, blah, blah...

Because I'm lecturing on Hegel this week and, although it's tempting to try to whip something up about how public reaction to the death of Anna Nicole Smith demonstrates the extent to which our culture really is a world of self-alienated spirit wherein our understanding of ourselves as self-conscious subjects can really be radically thrown by our recognition of a washed-up drugged-up former Playboy centerfold as another self-conscious subject (okay, semi-conscious, but nonetheless possessing of a consciousness - limited or otherwise - that might be negated by death... BIG SIGH...), although such Hegelian analysis of the death of a Trimspa model is tempting, my brain is too tapped out to do much beyond contemplating the unbearable cuteness of being that is demonstrated by the WonderBaby...

Hegel's interrogation into the Phenomenology of Spirit can really be most effectively answered by a baby's smile: I am aware of myself as mother because she presents herself to me as known. Also, because she says to me, with that smile: HEY! I SHIT IN THE TUB! FOR YOU!

... I haven't much to say. And in any case, whatever it was that I might have said while under the influence of the complete works of Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, E-Online and one too many glasses of blended scotch, you probably don't want to know.


Blogger Kyla said...

WonderBaby is indeed adorable. That level of cuteness mostly negates the pooing in the tub. *lol*

10:36 PM  
Blogger S said...

So, so pretty. Oh, my kingdom (such as it is) for a girl!

BTW, I was a philosophy major as an undergrad. You are reminding me why I never picked it up again after college... Too many fancy terms for me.

11:03 PM  
Blogger Mad said...

Too cute.

Wait for it though. Eventually the shame comes and she will cry that she failed you by failing to control her bowels in the tub and you'll be all WTF where did she learn this thing called shame. And you will mourn. Enjoy your smiling tub dump.

11:21 PM  
Blogger NotSoSage said...

Oh, I sooooo do, though.

11:50 PM  
Blogger kirida said...

I bet WonderBaby's also saying, "Come on in, the water's fine..."

11:57 PM  
Blogger Lara said...

oh my goodness, she is too much. especially knowing she's pooping in the tub. i'm sure the poop smelled like roses with a smile like that to go with it. ;)

12:02 AM  
Blogger The Estrogen Files said...

Wonderbaby is gorgeous, as always, and the poop in the tub is temporary. Enjoy her! Before you know it, before your eyes, she'll be nearly 10 and wanting "PRIVACY" in all things.

12:27 AM  
Blogger Lady M said...

>>unbearable cuteness of being

If I ever do start a separate cuteness blog, I will beg to borrow your phrase and WB pictures!

1:14 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm so glad to hear WonderBaby shits in he tub as well. My 3- year old tson have never done that but decided o try it last week. Biggest shit i've ever seen was floating around the tub...

By the way, that's the longest sentence I've ever read:-))

Cute photo as always!


4:42 AM  
Blogger Mocha said...

I propose you combine the scotch, Hegel, and shit for a new essay. You know I'd read it and then say, "She writes a damn fine blog, that HBM. I want to be her." In fact, I'd read it if it were just about the scotch n' shit.

[That title is now copyrighted and you must ask the express permission of Mocha Momma to use it. That's only because I saw the long-ass, no-vowel word verification waiting for me below.]

6:26 AM  
Blogger Christina said...

Leaving a log in the tub always evokes an extra special smile from a toddler, I've noticed.

She looks mighty proud of herself.

7:41 AM  
Blogger Beck said...

My children have all chosen to impress me with their tub-pooping skills WHILE I WAS IN THE TUB WITH THEM. This cut back remarkably on the number of baths the poor dears got to have with me.

7:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love that you take a philosophical slash comical approach to all you post. It makes me want to french kiss you ...if you were a boy, I'd have a gigantic crush on you right now...ay! what the heck...I have a gigantic crush on you right now.

She is hysterical with that smile!

8:07 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thank god you included the fabulous photo of Wonderbaby. All the talk of Hegel's philosophies of self-awareness were making ME long for a few glasses of blended scotch, in which I have cheap taste and a bottle of Dewar's in my liquor cabinet as we speak.

9:10 AM  
Blogger karengreeners said...

at first i thought you were talking about the vag exercise guy (nope, never wondered why that would be on your teaching itinerary), but quickly remembered that that is keigel, not hegel.

and 'shit in the tub' is always good for a laugh, so thanks for that.

9:18 AM  
Blogger kittenpie said...

Hey, she's beginning to look like a real sturdy toddler, isn't she?! Amazing how that happens right under our very noses. Not sure how you live with the cuteness.

10:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for posting the pic. It quiets the sickning feeling that the ANS drama creates. What a beautiful little one.

10:30 AM  
Blogger Redneck Mommy said...

Classic. And now I'm smiling remembering my Bug. Who shit in the tub every damn time.

While that may not have been your original goal in posting this ditty, it is a wonderful, er by-product.

Give WB a squeeze for me.

10:47 AM  
Blogger gingajoy said...

you should totally do the Hegelian reading of Anna Nicole. that's cutting edge pedagogy that is (and you never know--it might actually help your students get Hegel--I am NOT kidding).

Of course. I'm more of a Wittgensteinian m'self...

11:02 AM  
Blogger Run ANC said...

Stunning picture. An absolute classic.

11:52 AM  
Blogger you da mom! said...

Never read Hegel, but now that I know that Anna Nicole Smith and any number of pop culture burnouts can be analyzed by his passages, I might give it a try! ;)

The poop in the tub thing...so that really happens?

11:59 AM  
Blogger Julie Pippert said...

I'd be under the influence of that cuteness too.

What can I say to this:

I am aware of myself as mother because she presents herself to me as known. Also, because she says to me, with that smile: HEY! I SHIT IN THE TUB! FOR YOU!


12:07 PM  
Blogger motherbumper said...

Well if that isn't the cutest poop announcement ever.

12:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A smile like that can help you deal with anything...even poop in the tub.

12:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tub floaters got nuthin' on that smile. She lights up the whole room.

1:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I swear, HBM, that baby of yours has the most stunning features. I don't understand Philosophy, at all, but I know unbearable cuteness when I see it!

CNN went on forever today about "new speculations as to Anna Nicole Smith's cause of death". And how Zsa Zsa freakin' GABOR's husband could be the father of her baby. Rest assured, by next fall some college will have a Pop Culture class with A.N.S. as it's main subject.

2:42 PM  
Blogger Chicky Chicky Baby said...

Hear that sound?

That's the sound of my ovaries exploding. Cutebabycutebabycutebaby! Gah!

So what if there's poop? Look at those pink cheeks! Gaaaahhh!

2:44 PM  
Blogger josetteplank.com said...

Darn! That's one cute baby!

Is she spoken for? I mean, because I have a cute, younger man-baby who will be looking for a prom date in about 17 years. Things would be so much easier if I could arrange these things now and not worry that he's going to marry some girl who is afraid of her own poo.

How's that for being philosophical?

3:20 PM  
Blogger Ben and Bennie said...

God, I love your writing. The "semi-conscience" comment almost made me soil my screen.

Bathtub = Big Toilet

3:42 PM  
Blogger Kelly said...

What a delightful creature to have washed upon your shore.

(Even if she came with a trailing turd.)

3:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So am I the only one who just assumed that WB was mispronouncing "sit" and was not having a bowel movement in the tub? OUr little guy calls a clock a cock and for the longest time said what sounded like bitch for bridge. Need less to say we get some strange looks in public.
That is the cutest smile ever! She is getting so big!

4:28 PM  
Blogger crazymumma said...

Even Hegel would say aaaawww.

5:09 PM  
Blogger BOSSY said...

Um, Bossy says yeah to all dat.

8:00 PM  
Blogger moplans said...

Issue that baby a graduate degree. That is one hell of a thesis statement.

9:45 PM  
Blogger urban-urchin said...

i have her future boyfriend here. that baby is lethally cute.

10:29 PM  
Blogger Jennifer (ponderosa) said...

Those eyes! What beautiful eyes!

11:22 PM  
Blogger Not From Lapland said...

Wow! look at those eyes!

3:22 AM  
Blogger the mad momma said...

Ah! we went through that a few months back and now i am hysterical about putting him on the potty before the tub!!! Each time I see wonderbaby I wonder if she is real because she is just such a perfect little doll....

8:15 AM  
Blogger The Domesticator said...

Cute as always!
How was the scotch!

9:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh wonderbaby is so sweet. what a pecious little girl.and you know the saying.poop happens...LAVENDULA

11:10 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love you!

2:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This a great video on Poop in the Tub for parents. From DadLabs.com.

11:31 AM  

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