Her Bad Mother

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Still Cranky After All These Minutes

My throat is burning and my ears ache. My head feels weighted by rocks and it hurts to open my eyes. I'm sick, and I'm not happy about it.

WonderBaby is fine. So is the Husband, who felt under the weather for a day or two but was able to dope himself up with all manner of pharmaceuticals and ward off the virus that somehow mutated out of WonderBaby's little teething cold into a mama-smackin' monster that flung itself onto me and knocked me clean on my ass.

Havin' a bad week.

The Husband, bless his big manly heart, has been a trooper, tending to WonderBaby so far as he can and letting me sleep and brewing up hot gingery throat-relief concoctions over a hot stove in the smothering heat of Toronto's July. And WonderBaby, though climbing the walls - literally (halfway up the baby gate yesterday) - is being forgiving and focussing much of her energy on her father, who happily swings her about by the ankles and flings her toward the sky and encourages her in all manner of extreme baby sport, all the while tooting the theme song to the Muppet Show on a kazoo.

And, always, the smile:


The cheeky little smile that says aw, you sick Mommy? Lemme bash your head!

As sweet as those smiles, though, I can't help feeling a little overwhelmed by the general suckage of this week. Can't sleep (and here, yes, is further evidence that the gods have it in for me: WonderBaby has slept through the night, 11 hours straight, three nights in a row now. And yet awake I remain, reflecting upon the burning in my throat and thrumming in my ears), can't eat, can't write. The last, possibly (possibly), the most painful. No release from swirling thoughts, the better to lay awake at night. And so on and so forth.

Can't even blog-socialize. Yesterday was scatter-shot blog visiting, through the haze of discomfort, stopping here, linking there, forgetting where I was, whether or not I'd commented. And, in the process, mucking up my usual rounds and missing just about everybody. Then, instead of just starting over with Bloglines (which I still cannot figure out because I am stunned), I spent a very long time trying and failing (Typepad! WTF?) to leave comments at two blogs that I'd never visited before, obsessed with the desire to leave markers of my visit, before slamming my laptop shut in frustration and cutting short visiting hours. Today, I can't do visiting at all. I'm sorry. Not up to it. I know that you can't see me here, flushed and sweaty and voiceless in porridge-stained pajamas, but still. I feel that I would smudge up your screens, infect your virtual living rooms with viruses and clouds of funk.

Really. 'Cause gloom is following me and you don't want me dragging it your way. This morning I pulled this out of the mailbox:


Creepy. And not even interesting-creepy, which sometimes (not today) isn't so bad. I mean, first of all, if I did have questions about cremation, I'd Google them, and secondly, they wouldn't be questions like 'what is a columbarium niche?' They'd be a bit more grisly, a bit more Gil Grissom-y.

But whatever. I wasn't up for having whatever sicky mellow I'd got going from the Husband's throat brew harshed by creepy purple pamphlets about death. Thanks, Glendale Memorial Gardens. Thanks much.

And. My apologies to any one of you who came here looking for profanity or discourses on dolphin penises or marginally amusing pedantry. None up today. I can offer you this, though:


It's going to make me feel better. Soon, I hope.

Real soon.

(Cue Muppet theme song on kazoo. Gotta close on a high note.)

49 Comments:

Blogger Michele said...

Ack. A summer cold is the worst. Not that any cold is "better".

You need sleep. I know you know that. No Tylenol PM up there in CA? I swear by it when I am sick. Or a nice Nyquil coma.

Hope you feel better soon. If just to hide the kazoo :)

3:22 PM  
Blogger chichimama said...

Poor thing. Hope you feel better soon. Summer colds alwasy hit me hard too.

3:23 PM  
Blogger Liesl said...

Oh, I'm so sorry. And it's doubly stinky to be sick in the summer. I hope you feel better soon :)

4:04 PM  
Blogger Gabriella said...

Hopefully you get better soon! And that smile, god!!! And that is the cutest top on Wonderbaby ever!!!

4:05 PM  
Blogger Pattie said...

You are feeling that poorly and yet you still write so well...you impress me! :) I hope you are feeling better soon.

4:11 PM  
Blogger julia said...

How about a hot toddy before bed? Or just a shot of whiskey, since it's too hot for hot drinks? Maybe it would help you fall asleep and not have whirling thoughts.

I hope you feel better soon.

What cute shots of WonderBaby....

4:46 PM  
Blogger jennster said...

FEEL BETTER! thank the goddess you have help- could you imagine if you didn't?!?!

4:48 PM  
Anonymous Motherhood Uncensored said...

I hope you get better soon, lady.

And seriously, I hate when the sleep gods do that.

Bastards!

4:55 PM  
Blogger ninepounddictator said...

Poor wonder baby mommy!
Overdose on the vitamin C - yes, overdose.
Cold FX
Gargle salt water
popsicles...

5:22 PM  
Anonymous Binkytown said...

Boo! Sorry you are having such a tough week! Get better soon! Oh, the sleep irony. So cruel..

5:22 PM  
Blogger Melissa said...

Feel better. Typepad sucked yesterday, so it wasn't just you. The cremation thing is a little funny, sorry.

5:55 PM  
Blogger Granny said...

Blogger misbehaves all the time but I was surprised by typepad.

A friend who uses it told me it ate most of the comments which had already gone through as well.

Feel better soon.

6:04 PM  
Blogger Jerri Ann said...

Man, you sound awful! HOpe that helps, lol! Sorry, but I'm glad it is you not me! Try some whisky and honey with some hot cayenne pepper....hot toddies made by the g-parents will always make you feel better.

6:19 PM  
Blogger Mother Bumper said...

I want to run right down and take care of you! I really do! (omigod I sound like a stalker but I'm trying to sound like a friend.. a good friend not a crazy stalker friend.. I think I'm sounding like the stalker friend now... I'll shut up right now).

Well you know me, I can't stop talking so I'll end with this "where the funk did you get wonderbaby's cheetah print outfit because that ROCKS!!!!" it's sooo joan jett. Take care of yourself and send us a note when you are feeling better.

6:24 PM  
Blogger Rock the Cradle said...

Had the same typepad problems. Frustrating, but not as annoying as having a cold. Hope you get through it soon. It sounds awful.

Wonderbaby, man. She is the cutest!

6:41 PM  
Blogger metro mama said...

I'm sorry you're feeling so shitty.

I hope you feel better soon.

6:47 PM  
Anonymous mamatulip said...

Good god, that sounds perfectly awful. The only thing than being that sick in the dead heat of summer is being largely pregnant.

Feel better. Soon.

6:57 PM  
Anonymous krista said...

Hope you feel better soon. You can always do some mindless clicking like this one: http://www.quizgalaxy.com/quiz.php?id=114

It will tell you what your obituary should say. Fun.

7:48 PM  
Blogger Mom101 said...

Feel better dahlink. I also am backlogged on blogs but I only have work to blame it on. It's far more interesting to read about your burning throat and gorgeous bulbous-headed liliputian. Even if you don't think so.

8:48 PM  
Blogger Wendy Boucher said...

Get well soon. And feel free to post lots of pictures of wonderbaby. The most adorable (okay, one of the most adorable) baby on the web.

9:35 PM  
Blogger kittenpie said...

ugh, how awful! Sorry to hear you have been laid low by germies and bugs, but I'm glad for you that it's not everyone - the only thing that's worse than being sick yourself.

And really, don't put yourself out for that Muppet Show tune as a closer - WonderBaby is high note enough, cutie that she is. (Hey, do you need a babysitter for a couple hours on the weekend while you nap? Promise I'll give her back... )

10:30 PM  
Blogger Her Bad Mother said...

Aw, all the nice thoughts are like smooth single-malt scotch for the soul. Not enough to knock out the sick, but pretty damn good at smoothing out some of the existential wrinkles for a time.

10:36 PM  
Blogger Christina said...

I've been a little under the weather here too. Some kind of sinus gunk that isn't quite a full-out cold, but just enough to be annoying as hell.

My blog visiting has been sporadic as well, due to the sinus gunk and being way too busy this week. I've only had time to hit my "short-list", and I keep meaning to get back to some new blogs, but just haven't done it yet.

Hope you feel better soon.

11:21 PM  
Anonymous wordgirl said...

You had me at "dolphin penis".

11:51 PM  
Blogger lildb said...

ohhhhh, you poor girly. I'm so verrrry sorry. I was that sick a few times (I think, the brain is so hazy from that period) when my kidlet was wonderbaby's age, and it was effing *miserable*.

may your health return unscathed in a flash of blinding sleep. sleep that lasts for a long, long time.

*huuuuuge squeeeeze*

12:24 AM  
Anonymous chelle said...

hope you feel better soon ... we both have it here and it sucks not to have anyone to moan too...

1:46 AM  
Blogger Lowa said...

Hope you feel better!

I remember when my daughter's eyes were that deep dark blue. *sigh* Took till she was almost three for them to change to green. Her Dad's are green, and mine are DARK brown, so it was not a shock. Still, we were sad:(

2:42 AM  
Blogger mo-wo said...

You sound perfectly healthy to me. Take care, self, friend.

7:59 AM  
Blogger Jezer said...

Oh, I'm so sorry. I hope you feel better very, very soon.

But, gah, those photos of Wonderbaby are divine.

8:27 AM  
Blogger Jenn said...

Allie's teething cold turned into a crazy whooping cough...and now my husband is suffering like you. I know it sucks.

p.s. how cute is your husband with the kazoo!! LOL

10:08 AM  
Blogger crazymumma said...

You always make me larf my butt off, even when you are ailing.

Wonderbaby is looking superfine....only children can wear trashy cat prints and look good.

Hope you feel better soon, on the sleep dept. why not a wee pharmacutical, just to break the cycle?
Anne

11:15 AM  
Blogger something blue said...

I think I may have sympathy sickness for you. (Or it could be the frigid air conditioning here taking its toll.)

I hope all the Gods give you magical healing powers and some much need rest. One must be able to appreciate WonderBaby's smile while feeling 100% for maximum effect.

12:18 PM  
Anonymous Gurukarm Kaur said...

You know what, I think that if I'm ever so sick, or depressed, or non-human that even the sight of my own kids' smiles won't help, I'm just going to come to your blog and look at WonderBaby's pics. Because she's an angel on earth, I swear! :-)

Get better soon!

12:31 PM  
Blogger Silly Hily said...

Bless your heart.
I wish you a speedy recovery from your sucky summer cold.

2:40 PM  
Blogger Kristen said...

First, feel better soon. Second, CREMATION? what a thing to mail to someone!

Third-wonderbaby cute as always.

3:03 PM  
Blogger Susan said...

Chicken soup wishes (or whatever one wishes one sick with a summer cold!) from our corner for a speedy recovery!

3:22 PM  
Blogger Kristen said...

Oh, man. Feeling like that and taking care of a baby, no matter how sweet and adorable, is so hard. Hope you're feeling better soon.

3:36 PM  
Anonymous mothergoosemouse said...

Geez, what kind of cold do those cremation pamphlet hawkers think you have?

Wiggly toddler on lap straining to reach keyboard. Must go. Feel better.

3:54 PM  
Anonymous MIM said...

Feel better, Mama.

5:36 PM  
Blogger Jaelithe said...

The reason she is sleeping through the night only while you are too sick to sleep yourself is that all children are secretly experts in psychological torture. Just so you know ;)

With the combined might of Wonderbaby's obviously superior mental domination skills AND those enormous blue eyes, I am sure she is going to take over the world by the time she's 30.

6:07 PM  
Blogger Jozet said...

Oh no! Oh, I'm sorry...

But, Im even more sorry... the cremation pamphlet! What is that all about, lol?! Seriously?

Hope you're feeeling a bit better today.

11:42 AM  
Blogger bunmaster said...

Sorry you feel like crap.

I've got Mahna Mahna stuck in my head.

5:52 PM  
Anonymous wolfbaby said...

It's fate that they do that a twisted sense of fate!!!

Cute pics of the little one!!

Hope you get to feelin better.

9:54 PM  
Blogger Mommy off the Record said...

Aw, HBM, sorry you've been sick. What a cruel twist of fate that WB would be sleeping through the night while you are sick!

Well, it's Saturday now so hope you're feeling better today and the WB sleeps well for you tonight.

1:30 AM  
Anonymous Izzy said...

Awwww...I feel ya. I really do. I'm on the tail end of the cold that won't die myself. I hope you're on the mend and back to your fab self soon :)

3:10 AM  
Anonymous MOobs said...

I hope you feel better soon. Try to stay positive. Remember it could be worse, had you been a man it would have been 4 times as debilitating. There is nothing worse than "Man flu".

4:14 PM  
Blogger Lotta said...

Have you evolved from bad mommy to bad blogger? Take it easy on yourself! Besides the adorable pictures are a treat.

12:44 AM  
Blogger sunshine scribe said...

Oh NO! I have been under the weather too ... which SUCKS in this heat and have been a bad blogger and I missed this!

Those baby/daddy viruses always mutate and knock a sleep-deprived mama on her ass with a fury. What a crappy week. Wish there was something I could do. I so hope you feel better soon!!! Take it easy my friend.

Sending all my healing/healthy/ward off the cremation pamphlet vibes your way!

4:51 AM  
Blogger Stefanie said...

Sorry, I didn't have time to read all the comments so I don't know if I'm repeating someone else's thought but...I've been sick too and I've decided that I need stock in Nyquil because Daaaamn...the shit is gooooood. I take it every night and even with this horrible cold I have I've been getting sleep without any racing thoughts or obsessing on my itchy scratchy throat. Just an idea. Stock up.

11:56 PM  

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