tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post114476982898851300..comments2023-11-02T08:09:02.234-04:00Comments on Her Bad Mother: My Bad MotherHer Bad Motherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comBlogger16125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1145065820388416122006-04-14T21:50:00.000-04:002006-04-14T21:50:00.000-04:00That was a fabulous post. No matter what moms do, ...That was a fabulous post. <BR/><BR/>No matter what moms do, their kids are going to think they're nuts at least for a while, usually between about ages 13 and 25. Then, if the kids are smart, they suddenly think "OMG!!! All the stuff my darling parents did for me! They're merely human and yet they did ALL that! For me!" and fall back in sheer amazement.SUEB0Bhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16301963922769609715noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144976785642267252006-04-13T21:06:00.000-04:002006-04-13T21:06:00.000-04:00The guilt is crippling. It's about the only thing ...The guilt is crippling. It's about the only thing the Catholic church does well. I'd like to think an admirable side effect is a value system worth at least one token into the pearly gates. <BR/><BR/>I love the bad women family portrait.Carolyn S.https://www.blogger.com/profile/16460383065056980157noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144975767920167272006-04-13T20:49:00.000-04:002006-04-13T20:49:00.000-04:00I'm back... to say - TAG! You're it!I'm back... to say - TAG! You're it!kittenpiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05215443551546036909noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144934298573350122006-04-13T09:18:00.000-04:002006-04-13T09:18:00.000-04:00She was and is an awesome mom. And she knows it.Kr...She was and is an awesome mom. And she knows it.<BR/><BR/>Kristen - I'm going to pick up a copy of the Warner today and will definitely share my thoughts...<BR/><BR/>Mrs. Chicky - Gettin' on that tag, stat.<BR/><BR/>littlepinkcar - MILs? Gah. Perhaps someone else would like to take that one and I'll come and *comment*...Her Bad Motherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144900532102670662006-04-12T23:55:00.000-04:002006-04-12T23:55:00.000-04:00I love that you can clearly see your mom's guilty/...I love that you can clearly see your mom's guilty/ humiliating/distracting parenting techniques and somehow after reading your post I am left thinking she is the coolest. <BR/><BR/>At the same time, I so remember those exact approaches deployed by my mother. Especially the guilt. She was so good at it that I'd confess to things I'd done before she'd get warmed up. <BR/><BR/>But it worked 'cause she reared a "Good Girl" (but the kind of good girl that knows when to be bad -- even if I do feel guilty).Sandrahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17049745050947936354noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144897716752144812006-04-12T23:08:00.000-04:002006-04-12T23:08:00.000-04:00Wow! Your mom does sound great! A great sense of h...Wow! Your mom does sound great! A great sense of humour when dealing with children makes all the difference!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144889848792205972006-04-12T20:57:00.000-04:002006-04-12T20:57:00.000-04:00This was a fantastic post. Dare I say? Your Mom ...This was a fantastic post. <BR/><BR/>Dare I say? Your Mom sounds awesome. <BR/><BR/>Mostly, I love that you can love her with all of her wackiness. So many times, daughters blame their Moms for so much and take everything so seriously. I think they miss out when they do that. Kudos to you on not being one of those daughters :)Mega Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13658605467396189558noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144889024099934832006-04-12T20:43:00.000-04:002006-04-12T20:43:00.000-04:00Sorry to interupt again, but you've been tagged. M...Sorry to interupt again, but you've been tagged. My apologies.Chicky Chicky Babyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18056206889322232109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144880642352711622006-04-12T18:24:00.000-04:002006-04-12T18:24:00.000-04:00I think back to my own childhood when I have those...I think back to my own childhood when I have those "parenting" moments. Your mom sounds awesome. I, too, was the Good Girl, though dabbled in the occasional mishaps. Guilt is a powerful technique.Kristihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06674183841047522995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144876506060364252006-04-12T17:15:00.000-04:002006-04-12T17:15:00.000-04:00Ah, yes, I recognize the need to please and not st...Ah, yes, I recognize the need to please and not stray too far into dangerous behavious too, and I too, wish it on my daughter, at least to a reasonable extent. What parent doesn't use humiliation? My mom used loud opera singing and bad pictures, my friend's dad was known to be invaded by a chicken spirit at random moments or use bizarre accents, and misterpie can't wait to start in on pumpkinpie. All in good fun...kittenpiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05215443551546036909noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144868827708626622006-04-12T15:07:00.000-04:002006-04-12T15:07:00.000-04:00You should really read the Judith Warner Book (Per...You should really read the Judith Warner Book (Perfect Madness), lady - I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. <BR/><BR/>The chap I just finished talks a lot about how we are living out OUR fantasies and issues through our kids - being uber present because our moms were not (or vice versa). <BR/><BR/>My mom was struggling with her own crazy shit - mainly to make me "something" so I did everything and was everything - hard to live like that. Plus, she was fending off my crazy dad. <BR/><BR/>For me, it's just a matter of wanting my daughter to be happy and to live life to the fullest - AND to not have sex until she's 35. LOL. <BR/><BR/>God help me when she hits high school...ACK.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144864277635706702006-04-12T13:51:00.000-04:002006-04-12T13:51:00.000-04:00Loads of guilt from my mother. Similar results. ...Loads of guilt from my mother. Similar results. I can't quite seem to pull off the guilt thing in my house though. I tell C I am disappointed in him, he shurgs and tells me that that's just too bad, and that it is my problem, not his. Damn that self-esteem ;-)chichimamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17549929656881693553noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144864142947223502006-04-12T13:49:00.000-04:002006-04-12T13:49:00.000-04:00Yeah, Mom/Catholic guilt can screw you up for year...Yeah, Mom/Catholic guilt can screw you up for years. So why is it so darn effective?? <BR/><BR/>Personally, I would have prefered more guilt, instead I got a lot of "I said so's". Do you want to guarantee that a good girl will rebel against you - Tell her she can't do something "because you said so."<BR/><BR/>btw, your Kid 'n Play reference was spot on!Chicky Chicky Babyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18056206889322232109noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144862389775980422006-04-12T13:19:00.001-04:002006-04-12T13:19:00.001-04:00My mom's technic:Age 10-20: Boys are bad, smelly, ...My mom's technic:<BR/><BR/>Age 10-20: Boys are bad, smelly, disgusting. Guys are stupid like you daddy! Dont ever fall in love with these pathatic creatures. You will end up like me!<BR/><BR/>Age 22: how come you don't have a boyfriend? I think you are messed up! What are we going to do? Are you attracted to girls? Do you have sexual problems?<BR/><BR/>On the phone to everyone in 51 states: yeah...and my poor daughter has sexual problems! I don't know what to do with her! I think she should see a shrink. You remember cousin Lilie? They say she took pills.The City Galhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09819377234772187931noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144862375934291722006-04-12T13:19:00.000-04:002006-04-12T13:19:00.000-04:00Pre-guilt guilt is exactly right. Didn't always de...Pre-guilt guilt is exactly right. Didn't always deter me - I can still remember hanging out my bedroom window one night, racked, RACKED, with guilt for what I was about to do, but still dropping to the ground and bee-lining it downtown to a nightclub with my friends - but it did deter me more often than not. And if it didn't? Intense post-guilt guilt about the futility of the pre-guilt guilt. (And they wonder why Catholics are so often all fucked up.)<BR/><BR/>And yeah, she would so totally knock out anyone who got in her way. Cabbage Patch Kid, purse on sale, whatever. She'd take you DOWN. Still would.Her Bad Motherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03535958887714152413noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21558474.post-1144861203980080432006-04-12T13:00:00.000-04:002006-04-12T13:00:00.000-04:00I feel like I understand you so much more now!My m...I feel like I understand you so much more now!<BR/><BR/>My mom utilized some of those same tactics, with guilt being the biggest one. I was a straight A student because I was expected to be, and I never wanted my mom to be disappointed in me. She did such a good job at instilling that in me that my own conscious took over for her when I was older. I had pre-guilt guilt just thinking about disappointing her.<BR/><BR/>Cute pic, also. Your mom looks like one of those tough grandmas. You know, one of the ones who would knock the other grannies out of the way for the last Cabbage Patch Kid on the shelf.Christinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07345875955750219033noreply@blogger.com